I could not have known how much it would matter to me that I am a Grandfather. Here is my daughter Monica, a new mother herself, having a blast with her grandpa. (on the left) But isn't the title "grandpa" is for men with gray hair (oops, I've got some of that), goofy stories to tell (hmmm... I have plenty of those), and beards big enough so surprises can be hidden in them and found - it's kind of a "buried hairy" game for grand kids. These were a just a few of the attributes my father embedded in my understanding of the grandfather role while he successfully kept a sort of mystique alive while enjoying and entertaining my two girls. The pictures of his several grand kids playing with his beard are particularly memorable. Who needs Play Station (what is it version 12 by now) when you have hair cascading from you face and neck!
I find myself wondering what kind of grandfather I will be, now that Rachael Elizabeth Stauffer has passed one month old and is headed straight for her pre-teens. I know the time will be precious and very enjoyable, but will also pass so quickly that I want to plan now so I will not be left struggling to grow a beard when it is too late.
I expect my job is to enjoy this little girl more than to impress or impart, but it is impossible for me to avoid thoughts of my part in a living legacy - now in its next edition. I can't wait for my knee to become tired from the bouncing, my eye's to be bloodshot from staring in amazement, my hands to be numb from applauding her successes. I know she will one day realize how blessed she is, in stead of burdened, to have Monica and Matt to love and support her, and that the Stauffer family doesn't play in the minor leagues when they pitch their love.
One day she'll 'get' how much she is loved. But right now I just hope one day to 'get' the words out. I only hope I can speak when she stands before me, cute as her mother did many years ago and I know very well I will have to focus my attention hard just to release her from my arms the first time she runs to jump into them. Somehow I miss it already and it has not yet happened. I guess I just can't wait to know this, my little girl's little girl!
Today I just wonder if the what, when, and how's of my love will be received in any way comparable to what I feel for her, her mother and her dad. I am starting a list of "stories to make sure to tell the grand kid(s)." These will be our little (or big) secrets and should prove very fun around the holidays as we remember the lives lived prior.
I'm not throwing away my razor yet, but I will be practicing my dad's silly magic thumb trick so the Elvy legacy will breathe on.
It's good the be a grandpa, even when. right now, I'm mostly looking forward!
3 comments:
Excellent post and superb pictures! Heck, now I want to be a Grandpa, too!! :-)
I can't even imagine what it's like to hold the daughter of your daughter, to wonder how you will view someone as your grandchild and how she will see you as her grandfather. I do know that you will be great in the role because you will give your complete YOU, which is a great YOU, very loving, generous, curious, vibrant, energetic (especially with coffee in you), and meaningful. Moreover, you have balance, a healthy perspective.
As for the beard, well, my guess is that you don't need to have one to be a super Grandpa. :-) Our dad wore one because ... well, come to think of it I don't know why he had a beard. Do you?
lots of love,
Yvonne
I think the beard trick can be adapted to a nonfacial haired grandpa. Relly when it came down to it, Jes and I loved that game so much because it was something that we only did with grandpa. So I'm sure with your creativity you could come up with something that is just Rachael and yours. But Daddy, I just wanted to tell you that no matter how old I get, you will always be my Daddy. And I really look forward to the first time that Rachael recognizes you as grandpa and wants to be in your arms. Cause seriously, with the way that Rachael's Daddy loves being around you somthing is bound to rub off beyond your sheer character. And as you make up grandparenting based upon Grandpa's example, I too am inventing parenting based upon you and Mom's example. - look forward to seeing grandma and grandpa today. We all love you both. Thank you for teaching us about lasting love. And thank you for teaching us the humility that just flashed through your mind as you commented in your head to the last statement. =) love you.
So, until Aunt Yvonne posted your link on her blog, I had NO idea you and mom had a blog! Man, what the heck? Hiding this from me? :-P
I vote we spend some time in the garage figuring out how to bend nails so you can do the bloody halloween hand trick. Though, probably Rachael will pick up on your own quirks. "Shhh...a plane."
Speaking of which, when I left yesterday that double bladed helicopter flew RIGHT OVER THE HOUSE. I'm sure if you weren't having a migraine, you would have popped up and looked out the window. :-)
I love the pictures of Mom and Grandpa on the right. :-)
Looking forward to reading more of your thoughts. :-)
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